We are humbled as we see your response to our campaign. This September, quite a handful of people reached out to us with their experiences with depression. We have had a substantial opportunity to learn as we listened to them. Being in a fortunate spot to know your stories has indeed given us more insight into depression.
If I were to plot a graph between age-groups and causes of depression, we would see a large spectrum. While academic failures, negative body image, parental ignorance, and bullying are the causes among the children, unfaithfulness, and rejection in romantic relationships is among the top causes in adolescents and young adults. An alarming rise in suicide rates during the past years identifies rejection and infidelity among its the major causes. Let’s talk about them.
The “Feel good” theory
The current trend of television and social media has time and again encouraged the “feel good” movement. Every now and then there is a product out in the market designed to “make our lives better” and when they don’t, we feel, “is there something wrong with me? and why doesn’t life seem worthwhile anymore. We are supposed to feel good all the time about everything is among the many lies that are fed to us in this era dominated by social media and the truth that its okay to not be okay, is suppressed and overlooked.
Life’s good, even with its strifes and struggles. How we wish, we could feel good all the time, but we don’t and its okay. What if the generations and people we lost, were taught that its normal to feel immense sadness. And just like you would seek help for an immense bodily ache, exactly the same needs to be done for a troubled mind.
Did you go through a wounded childhood?
You may have had parents who didn’t get along well together.
You lost precious years of your life to ‘seeking attention-being ignored’ cycles.
It surely wounded you and your heart still bears the scar. But You might feel happy to know that their problems began before you even arrived.
It was not because of you that your father left. It was because he didn’t want to stay.
It’s not that you aren’t worthy of their love and attention.
The truth is, their differences kept them from giving you their love and attention.
Were Bullies amongst your greatest fears?
Were you bullied in school because of your shy or introverted nature or because of your body? Listen to me. Those bullies may have affected your self-worth but they failed tremendously to see the unique person that you are. The society labels you according to your appearance. Don’t give them that authority. Your inner being is more than precious than anything else. Let your talents, passion and perspectives define who you are.
A Rusting Relationship?
You may have been in a one-sided relationship.
Finding out whether or not your partner was committed to you is a blessing. Because now you don’t have to spend your life with a person who doesn’t really know what love is. You may have been rejected by someone you admired. It impacted your emotional state and your self-image. Although it might have reflected that you are not what they are looking for, believe me, you may have something that someone out there is exactly looking for. Don’t hurt yourself to gain validation of others. You are your own person. Learn your worth. Isolation is good, not to mourn for yourself but to learn about yourself. You are a handiwork of God. You carry a purpose. Look for it. Accomplish it.
The “Happy” part!
People everywhere go through these hardships, you may be glad to know that you are not alone. We are always taught to “never let go, never give up”. Sometimes it isn’t the fanciest and wisest things to do. The important truth is that “Letting go” of these past experiences is what begins the healing in you. “Comparison is a thief of Joy – Theodore Roosevel.”
Let go of the past hurt, let go of the pain, let go of the people who do not appreciate you for what you are. Move on with yourself, when no-one is by your side. That’s when you will begin to find the real you. Let go of the feelings of rejection and the person who rejected you. Let go of your past failures. Do not compare your lives with others. You cannot compare two things are not similar. They are different, each one unique in its own way.
Learning to face and embrace unpleasant experiences can change a person inside out. If you decide not to go through this phase you are struggling with in life and give up, you will never know the strength you actually carry.
When it hurts – Observe, life is trying to teach you something.”
Stephanie Benett Henry
Do not hate life for the lessons it gives you; embracing them is wisdom.
Depression in most cases manifests because of our own repression. The negative self-talk we have during the most vulnerable of times, the blames we take on ourselves. We should equip ourselves with the fact that everything does not always end how we intend it to. We often leave so much to chance, because no one tells us that life will get hard. At such a time, whether you stand or choose to fall depends upon you.
Your problem, worries and feelings are not insignificant. But you’re not alone in them. Your life is not meant to be bad. Suffering is a truth, its a part of life. We all need help in learning to embrace these sufferings in a way that would bring out the best in us. We need to go through difficult phases of life, so that we may come out victorious. Be a victor; not a victim.